Ananääs

“it came with the shaft” (shaft as in the stick of a shovel or a broomstick)

One word: Bánh mì

Regarding your main question: you don’t fit a square in a round hole.

Mom used to call it “hilloviikot” or “jam weeks” in English.

I take 3 grams of vitamin C, some ibuprofen and zinc for the first symptoms, that often helps. If I get properly sick I drink plenty of ginger & lemon tea and eat berries and something easy like porridge. What helps a lot is rinsing the nasal cavity with warm salt water several times a day, I don’t have a netipot so I just use a drinking bottle or something similar.